Saturday, September 24, 2005

Fortune And Fame

J.D. Fortune
Instant Rock Star

After a grueling 3 month reality TV audition, J.D. Fortune, a 32 year old former Elvis impersonator from Canada, was selected by the 80's rock band INXS to be their new lead singer during last Wednesday's grand finale CBS semi-reality series, Rockstar:INXS. Fortune went from literal rags - living out of his car in a small town in Nova Scotia, Canada - to virtual riches (including virtual fame) in the amount of time that many were enjoying their summer vacation. A dream come those who still care about rock and roll, that is!

"If You're Happy And You Know It
Raise Your Hand"

J.D. along with 14 other wanna-be lead singers were all participants in this summer's CBS reality series, which was formatted like a rock and roll Survivor, where each week, one singer was voted out of the competition by the members of INXS. Although not a ratings juggernaut, the series always managed to be those who still care about rock and roll, anyway.

And Then There Were Six

A favorite on forum boards and blogs across the those who still care about rock and roll, anyway...many fans were rooting for the likes of Mig, Jordis, Ty, Suzie and Marty to be the one who gets to sing 'What You Need' for a living. However, it was INXS' decision all along, and Fortune's quirky and dangerous style and attitude seemed to better fit the band...and seemed the closest to former lead singer Michael Hutchence, who sadly committed suicide in 1997. Hopefully, Fortune will sidestep those same footsteps.

Within hours of being selected, Fortune and band appeared on several radio stations, The Ellen DeGeneres Show, as well as The Late, Late Show. A song that JD co-wrote with INXS, 'Pretty Vegas' is currently receiving heavy airplay....on those stations that still care about rock and roll.

Meet The New Boss
Much The Same As The Old Boss

The band is now complete, and will be releasing a new album in late November, and also will begin a new tour in January. Great news....for those who still care about, you know.

Sunday, September 11, 2005

Survive This!

Richard Hatch
Gets A Reality Check

Richard Hatch is up a creek without his paddle. The original winner of the original million dollar grand prize from the original edition of 'Survivor' was indicted Thursday on 10 charges, including failure to pay taxes on the $1,000,000 prize, as well as other charges including filing a false tax return, wire fraud, bank fraud and mail fraud. Not exactly a good idea to try and outwit, outplay or outlast the IRS!

"But it's MY money!
They gave ME the check!!!"

Hatch "allegedly" filed false tax returns in 2000 and 2001 and failed to report $327,000 in income from hosting a Boston-based radio show. Also, he "allegedly" took another $28,000 he earned from a rental property he owns. Hatch had two accountants prepare tax returns that included his 'Survivor' winnings but did not file them when he learned he would owe hundreds of thousands of dollars in taxes. In 2002, he had one of the accountants prepare a second return that did not include his TV show winnings. He filed that one, which called for a $4,500 refund! That might explain why he enjoys parading around in the nude so much, to display his huge balls!

And if that wasn't bad enough, Hatch also "allegedly" dipped into donations to his charity, Horizon Bound, spending some $36,500 of the funds supposedly allocated to the charity on his personal expenses. In one example, he "allegedly" used a $10,000 donation he received after appearing on NBC's 'The Weakest Link' in order to complete some renovations on his home. The money was intended to go to his charity. Not new chairs in his tea room!

"Was that wrong?!
I really didn't know!"

Hatch originally agreed to plead guilty to the charges, but later backed out of the agreement in March, claiming he believed CBS was responsible for taking care of the taxes on his $1 million Survivor prize. According to his attorneys, Dewey Cheatum & Howe, Hatch believed that he was an employee of CBS during his appearance on 'Survivor', and that they should've withheld his taxes for him. The official response from CBS attorneys was, "Riiiiiight!"

If Hatch is found guilty on all 10 charges, he could face 75 years behind bars and millions of dollars in fines. But there's still a good chance he'll be appearing on the new Fox reality series, "Celebrity Cellblock Makeovers".

"If they want the shirt off my's too late!"

Richard...the grand jury has spoken. You're an idiot.