Adopt-A-Polar Bear!

Mommy?!!

From time to time we like to provide our readers with various public service announcements, (which are usually just veiled attempts at making fun of other web sites). This time we offer up Save-A-Polar Bear! Yes, for only $25, you can provide a polar bear with a warm meal, a cozy shelter, and hopefully a slight bit of assurance that the big-ass oil companies won't dump toxic oil spills into their drinking water.

If you have a hard time warming up to polar bear, then perhaps you'd be interested in adopting a cuddly jaguar! Yes, the jaguar also needs lots of hugs and a clean place to poop. Your gift of $35 will help keep the hunters and land developers at bay, allowing the near-extinct jaguar the assurance that he will live to prowl and devour smaller, more defenseless creatures another day.


"I Like To Cuddle!"

And who could resist those cute and cuddly sea otters?! Wouldn't you feel good about yourself, knowing that for only $25, you can assist the Defenders of Wildlife in making sure the big-ass oil companies don't accidentally dump a tankard of precious oil into their limited habitat?


Wolves Are Easily Potty-Trained!

All kidding aside - maybe - the Defenders of Wildlife organization is doing its best to keep these endangered and threatened species alive and kicking (or splashing). Check out their website to learn how you can help. Or, to see what other adorable critters you can adopt. Nothing will make you feel warmer inside than getting that first postcard from your very own adopted snowy owl, thanking you for keeping those bastard land developers at bay.




Your Donation Will Give Me
A Much-Needed Manicure!